A couple of days ago we had some gorgeous autumn sunshine after a few dark and dreary days. I'd just got up and was getting dressed when I realised how warm the sun was and decided to sit right there and collect some sunshine D! The rest was welcome though, dressing is hard with a weakened body.
I only managed about ten minutes in that chair, but it was lovely and warm. I love the sunshine so much, the warmth really brings a sense of wellbeing and eases the aches a bit. Not looking forward to a long winter, but it will make those sunny moments that much more amazing!
Today marks 18 months of this Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. At least 18 months in this severe housebound state, we imagine I might have had it milder for at least 6 months before this. As a Christian, I find myself reflecting on the role of my faith through chronic illness.
I don't believe God made me ill or that He is testing me. I don't think God works like that. In my view, that would contradict His character of Love. Many people who suffer from long term illness and disability question God's love and wonder why they are so unwell. In this post I want to address those questions.
Today has been quite productive! We just had our shower doors replaced this week, which meant waiting at least 24 hours for the silicone to dry before we could use the shower. It smells really bad, but Praise God we found a cheap little fan on Amazon and it's been such a help with the ventilation in the room.
It's a strange feeling of gratitude, shame and even guilt as a thirty-something year old woman, who looks perfectly healthy, walks around a supermarket with a walking aid most commonly used by the elderly. When elderly people who are clearly struggling are walking around the same supermarket without any mobility aids, the looks you get cause all sorts of emotions to surface.
Today has been amazing! Its such a gorgeous day, extremely hot and sunny. I've only spent short bursts outside as my skin burns in the sun today - it's that hot! I started the day with a lovely reading session out on the patio, the sun had just come round the wall and was slowly flooding my patio with light and heat.