How Can I Be Physically Disabled And Not Depressed?
I'd like to speak about my own mental health. I feel like some people misunderstand my condition, so I wanted to address the matter directly. Yes, I have a severely debilitating illness. Yes, I practically live in bed. No, I cannot go out and I cannot have visitors coming over without paying for it, but I am okay. Seriously.
I do not suffer from depression or anxiety or feel upset, or anything like that, about being ill and housebound. But it's come to my attention that many people around me seem to be more distraught over my condition than I am.
I actually live with an indescribable peace and inner joy which I cannot attribute to anything except God. Yes, when I'm in a lot of pain, I feel sorry for myself in it, I might even cry if it's really bad or if I'm feeling particularly weak physically in a moment, but that was the case before my illness too.
When I was sick, it felt yuk, I'd cry myself to sleep and then wake up and get on with things. Life happens and that includes illness. Life goes on. It is what it is. This is my current season, and I'm okay, my life hasn't ended, it's still quite fulfilling, thank you.
I don't mean any offense to those who struggle with mental health, I get it, I have experienced depression in the past, I understand, I'm just saying that currently that is not my burden.
So, please don't feel sorry for me and treat me as if I'm the one feeling depressed and hopeless, I'm not, but maybe you think you would in my position. Please don't stress over my health - but guard your own. Please don't tell me to "hang in there", there's absolutely no need for that. I don't even know what to do with that.
Basically there is no need for holding on, because I'm held. Praise God!
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