It’s easy to get caught up in all the negatives that happen in life. Things don’t go your way, you fall ill, you lose people or your job, you feel sick, there are just so many things that can bring us down, but this is just part of life.
The minute we stop expecting life to be a fairytale and accept reality, that’s the moment we open ourselves up to the truth and the freedom that comes with it. It’s hard to expect perfection at all times. It’s hard on ourselves and on those around us. Nobody can live up to that expectation. Life doesn’t work that way.
There is no normal or perfect apart from God, there is just life and it is filled with good and bad, daily. It’s a constant flow, like your laundry and dishes… You fix it once, but soon there will be more. It’s a part of life, why do people act shocked and surprised that they have to deal with it over and over again. Accept it, embrace it and experience the freedom it brings to no longer go through life in those chains of, worry, disappointment and resentment.
Life isn’t a flat line, it’s not linear, it’s a messy, twisting and turning rollercoaster ride. Some parts are fun, others are terrifying, sometimes you’re heading forward and then there’s a sharp turn and you feel like you’re going the wrong way and everything is upside down. But it’s all part of the ride, you’re still going towards the same general direction, it’s just not ever going to be a boring, predictable straight line.
Focus your gaze on the good things each day brings. Focus on being grateful for all the small things people so often overlook.
The positive words, the beautiful view, the comfort and protection of your home, the smells, sounds and colours around you. The people God has brought into your life whether in person or online.
You are not alone in your struggles, but focusing on your struggles can make you feel very lonely. Take your eyes off yourself and your hurt, give yourself a break, focus on the good stuff. It’s not going to make the struggles go away, but it will certainly make your experience of life more enjoyable and rewarding.
Here’s a little exercise that really brought this point to life for me: If you hold your arm up and make a fist. Your fist represents you problems, you can see your problems, but you can also see the room (life) around it if you look around your fist. But if you bring your fist right up in front of your nose, staring at it, so it is the only thing you’re focusing on, the rest of the room gets lost behind it as the closer it gets the bigger it seems. It’s not really got any bigger, it only seems like it because now it’s all you’re looking at, it’s what you’ve chosen to pull close and focus on.
You might not have a choice when it comes to your circumstances, but you do have a choice when it comes to what you spend your time, energy and focus on within those circumstances. Try your best to focus on the good stuff!
When living with a chronic illness, whether it’s a physiological or psychological condition, it is common to start doubting yourself. Your confidence dwindles as you lose the ability to function the way you once did. You might start to feel useless, helpless and hopeless, but there is so much you can still offer the world!
You have overcome so much already. Every day you wake up is a new victory and a clean page in your story on which you can write the next chapter. You’re brave and strong. Things that healthy people take for granted; their mental clarity, their energy, their physical strength – you fight for every little bit of it that you can find just to get through each day!
I know that in the lonely dark times, you feel like you’re alone in your struggle and you doubt you’ll pull through it sometimes, but you’re never alone! Your Heavenly Father is with you always, He has promised to never leave you or forsake you. Never. No matter what you/re going through, how dark it may seem, you’re never walking this road alone and all things are possible with Christ who gives you strength.
Just think about this: You’ve got through 100% of your worst days so far! That’s amazing!
You’ve got what it takes to get through whatever you’re going through. He doesn’t call the equipped, but equips the called. He will provide you with the strength and the courage and even the very breath that you need to get through each moment. Just keep your eyes on Him and believe.
You’re a warrior, a survivor!
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Good morning friends, I’ve just woken up and it’s almost 11.30. I’m stiff and achy, was a little shaky upon waking, but I’m so happy!
I was brushing my teeth and realised I’ve been wearing the same clothes the whole week! Waking and sleeping. That grossed me out a bit, but it isn’t the first time this has happened and won’t be the last.
As I was filling in my journal last night, I noticed that every day this past week, except my birthday on Friday (Yay!), was marked as a flare day. Every single day.
Sometimes, no matter how hard we try to do the right thing, we just flare amyway, I can’t even remember what might have caused this week long flare.
I didn’t even realise it had already been so long. It’s like my memory resets when I have a good day and I am emotionally energised by the good days for quite some time after.
It’s like that good day will stay in my memory and the joy it gave me will just last, like a gust of wind in my sails, pushing me ahead until the next one. Despite actually paying for it physically for some time after.
It doesn’t even have to be a good day really, it could be a good meal or a fun chat with a friend or a beautiful comment from somebody I’ve never even met who connected over something I shared online.
These are all small things to the heathly person, but they are accomplishments worth celebrating if you’re chronically ill and housebound.
The good experiences we have daily fill our sails and can carry us forward to the next port. That could be a celebration, a visitor, an outing – any of those beautiful occasions that are rare and exciting, but also potentially difficult exhausting.
The effects of such occasions are often quite positive on us emotionally and are great for out mental health, but can be quite draining or even painful physically, which will mean once again focusing on the small blessings each day brings until we’re able to enjoy the celebration at the next port.
So you can see how the small things in life are so important. When you’re stuck in bed paying for some semblance of normality you tried to experience, it’s those little things that can mean so much: a text or a card in the mail, the sunshine on your face, the sound of birds outside, a delicious meal, a soak in the bath, clean sheets, a quiet neighbourhood, the view from your bedroom window…
Search for the beauty, the joy, the silver lining in every day. Focus on the good. Practice gratitude over every small gift that each day brings and let that feeling fill your sails like a gust of wind until the next one comes.
Life is going to be full of waves and high waters, specially if you’re ill, it affects every aspect of your life: physical ability, relationships, finances, confidence, faith, mental health, your independence, etc.
However, you can focus on the waves and let fear, anger, anxiety and panic set in, or you can focus on the fluffy clouds above, the blue sky, the sunshine, the fresh air, and be grateful for the shelter and protection you have and for every gust of wind that fills your sails, even just a little, pushing you forward and closer to your next port.