I was lying in the bath relaxing last night when I felt the shakes coming on… This is what I get for walking to the bathroom and getting undressed. I started feeling a bit of the internal tremors at this point, I imagined it might come to the shakes, and then as I lay in the tub to rest, before washing, they suddenly started up. (see the video clip below)
This is just the start, it then takes over my whole body and that’s when holding my phone, or anything else for that matter, becomes very hard.
It’s hard to deal with these unexpected flares or relapses that seem to come out of the blue.
You end up asking yourself a million questions. What did I do wrong? Did I eat the wrong thing? What did I do yesterday or the day before to cause this much pain? Why am I so weak today, did I overdo it this week? Was the TV too loud? Did I miss the signs and push too hard? Did I get over excited about something?
It can be a bit worrying when you are sure you’ve done everything right, but your body fails you anyway. The key is to not get distressed, because that just makes things worse. Stress absolutely is your enemy. Continue reading
People with ME all suffer at varying degrees, we cannot compare our flares to somebody else’s. What one considers an ME/CFS flare another considers just another regular day with ME. What one person with ME considers a normal day, might be somebody else’s idea of torture. Once thing they all have in common is that everybody’s battle is devastating.
We learn to acknowledge and respect everybody’s pain and everybody’s victories, because despite not fully understanding each other’s experiences, we can all agree on a few things: ME/CFS is life draining, heavy, isolating, painful, lonely, misunderstood and just plain horrible to deal with. And none of us would ever choose to have it or wish it upon our worst enemy.Continue reading
I often see people with ME/CFS writing about how they have spent hours in the emergency room only to be completely disappointed, misunderstood or even disbelieved. They go to the emergency room because they are feeling so weak and exhausted that they don’t know where else to go or what to do, they’re scared because they feel so utterly ill. I understand the fear that leads you to that conclusion, it’s scary to lose control of your body, but it’s often an unnecessary risk to your own health. Let me explain why I think so…Continue reading
I am regularly contacted by people who have recently been diagnosed with Post Viral Fatigue or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. They are often scared, worried and confused, but also hopeful and determined to return to their normal life. Their question is usually the same: what can I do?
Having a diagnosis of PVF or CFS is difficult to deal with because there is so little information out there and often doctors don’t know what to tell you. They haven’t been trained in the management of CFS and are often ill-equipped to give advice to newly diagnosed patients.
In this post, I will outline some of the main points you need to be aware of as a newly diagnosed patient. Things your GP might not tell you. I am not a doctor, but I am a patient, and I have spoken to many other patients with decades of experience in living with this condition.
Doctors call these long-term sufferers “expert patients” and the advice they gave was vital in my initial stages of PVF/CFS. I will summarise that wisdom below in the hopes that it will help many more.Continue reading
I’ve had quite a few people ask what I’m using for pain management. One of my favourite things since falling ill is MSM. It is my one staple since I first heard about it and it’s potential to help the body heal from all sorts of things.
It is sometimes referred to as the “miracle supplement” and also the “beauty mineral” because it is so beneficial in so many areas. One of the reasons for this is that MSM makes our cell walls more permeable, meaning that toxins can be more easily removed and nutrients can more easily be absorbed.Continue reading
I actually left the house this week! Leaving the house is not something that happens very often when you have a chronic illness as debilitating as ME/CFS. Months can go by without seeing the other side of my front door. I have reached a point where I’m able to walk around the house daily without causing too much payback, but going out is still so utterly draining that it usually takes me days to recover.
This week I was able to leave the house for the first time in months. It’s my mum’s birthday today, but we celebrated a little early as our parents were here for their weekend. We went shopping together for the first time in ages!
It was a gorgeously sunny day, so I got dressed in a pretty floral dress and hopped on my wheelchair where I stayed all day. Knowing how taxing an outing is and how much sensory stimulation affects me, I tried to prepare as best I could:Continue reading
We are settled in the new house now. I’m doing much better than I was a few months ago in London!
Still housebound, but I’m able to be up and walk around the house in the day, no more staying in bed all day (except during flares if I overdo things, like the last two days, see pic) but I hadn’t really had a big flare since moving to the new house in May!Continue reading
Today is one of those days…
I’ve overdone things this week. Went out to GP on Monday and although I was in wheelchair, it knocked me hard and I then also went into Sainsbury’s afterwards to get my meds, should have stayed in the hot car rather than going with into the busy supermarket, but the pharmacy had a delay in preparing my medication, so we thought the cooler shop would be better.
Then the next day I somehow almost doubled my step count! Not sure how that happened, I was in the house all day. I really felt it in the evening though, so much pain… Not good.
Last night my knees were on fire again and today I’m just drained. I didn’t even wake up until 10am! That is unusual. Silly me! I’m always too enthusiastic when I’m feeling good and then I overdo it. I’m sure a full day of complete rest will be good for my body though.
Be kind to yourself, your body works hard, listen to it, nurture and nourish it and don’t forget that rest is a vital part of life!
No step goals today, just rest goals!
Regardless of how weak I’m feeling, it’s a gorgeous day again, one can’t be anything but happy on a day like today!
This might seem like a strange motto for the new year, but before you decide I’ve lost the plot, let me explain: I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, also known as Myalgic Encephalomyelitis or ME/CFS. It’s main characteristic is Post Exertional Malaise (PEM). Feeling really ill, weak and exhausted after any physical, emotional or mental exertion.
This means brushing my teeth, getting excited about a visitor coming or writing this post is exhausting and will have consequences in the form of a variety of symptoms.Continue reading