I can't read this without a smile on my face and shaking my head in agreement. In this three-part series our guest author, David Graham, shares his humorous take on life with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis. I think it also ties in wonderfully with our Effects Of M.E. awareness campaign. I hope it makes you giggle as much as I am!
I've also created some graphics you can share online if any of David's comments resonate with you. Click on any of the graphics to zoom in.
You Might Be An M.E. Sufferer If...
1) You sanitize your hands for no reason.
2) You never leave home without an early-exit strategy.
3) You routinely use phrases that make little sense to healthy people: “crashing,” “brain fog, “wired and tired,” etc.
4) Sleep masks, white noise and sleeping pills are bare necessities.
5) You’ve been trying to plan a social engagement. But at this point, you’ve cancelled the
cancellation date’s cancellation date.
6) When normal people complain about tiredness, you feign compassion while inwardly rolling your eyes.
7) Your new midnight hunger craving is air.
8) Dreams have replaced vacations.
9) You start a movie and then a family member enters the room saying, “You know we watched this a couple months ago, right?”
10) Your fish oil consumption makes you wonder how the oceanic ecosystem survives.
11) In a moment of indulgence, you gobble a few handfuls of potato chips…and then spend like four stomach-bloating hours regretting it.
12) You peruse chronic illness forums more than Facebook, YouTube and Twitter combined.
13) You haven’t shaved in over a month.
14) You think you’ve communicated the gravity of your illness, but then come the dreaded follow-up questions: “So you’re really tired, eh?,” “Maybe you’re just stressed,” “You should try (insert trivial or nutty health advice here).”
15) You feel like deep-fried ice cream: both chilled and sweaty at once.
16) Your appointment preparation is as intense as the appointment itself.
17) You regard Unrest as the greatest film since The Godfather Part II.
18) Your inflammatory markers say “all good, nothin’ to see here,” but your joints exclaim, “Help, we’re on fire!”
19) If you saw Ron Davis (the ME researcher) at the supermarket, you’d ask for his autograph. But this’ll never happen…because supermarkets intimidate you.
20) The most mentally taxing thing you did this year: those godforsaken disability forms.
About The Author
David A. Graham is a PhD candidate (Theological Studies) at the University
of Toronto, Canada.
For two years he has been on an indefinite leave of absence thanks to a
disabling relapse of post-infectious ME/CFS.
He mostly enjoys doing nothing.
You can access the entire gallery of images in this series, here.
If you'd like to share something you've written about life with chronic illness, please get in touch. I'd love to share your story on ChronicallyHopeful.com too.
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